6. Boredom & Prayer Lists

Dear Jim,

I certainly know what it’s like to grow bored in prayer and fall asleep. I also had a hard time with that at first. At the time, my spiritual director recommended that I try having a cup of coffee with our Lord to combat the exhaustion. I tried it, but found little success because I was drinking coffee all day anyways, so an extra cup in the morning didn’t make a difference in how tired I was. However, when I cut back to just one cup a day, I found it to be extremely helpful to have that cup in the morning with God. My wife even set the coffee maker on a timer so that it would automatically brew a very aromatic pot of coffee just before my alarm went off. The inviting scent of the fresh coffee gave me an extra incentive to roll out of bed and enjoy time with God.

I wonder if some of your boredom stems from how you are praying. Most people get bored when they feel that their prayer has to cover certain topics like their family, their church, missionaries they support, and so on. These are excellent things to pray for, but if they occupy too central a spot in our prayer lives then our prayers will feel very routine and boring. I find it helpful to keep a prayer list with these items on it, and find a space to talk with God about them outside of my regular prayer time. I pray for them as I walk to the train station each morning. My wife does it as she walks the dog.

I reserve my dedicated prayer time to talk with God about the things that are on my heart for the day. I use these conversations to process my feelings with God in real-time. I might end up talking about the things from the list--those topics are not off-limits--but I only pray about them if they are concerning me that day. I once read that it is never boring to talk vulnerably about how we feel with the one we love. That applies to our relationship with God as well. Speaking with God in this way builds real intimacy with him.

An important first step is to begin by telling God how you are feeling at the moment. Tell him what’s on your mind, what you’re stressed about and what you’re looking forward to. Have a conversation with him about these things, and ask him for his help where you need it. Try conversing with God in this manner, and let me know if the feelings of boredom persist.

QUESTIONS FOR REFLECTION:

For some highly structured people a list based prayer time is very life giving. For others it can be very boring. How do you handle praying for routine things? Whether lists work for you or not, try a few days of just talking with God about the things that are on your mind as you would with a friend. How is that experience different?